Tomorrow I will be twenty-seven. I’m not going to lie … I’m not at all where I thought I would be at 27. But I feel really good about who I am over all. Not saying there aren’t things I wouldn’t want to change about me and my life but the truth is I like who I am and I like what I have accomplished in my life. I’ll admit I have felt a bit bummed this last weekend (I’m blaming some of this on it being my time of the month) because I am turning 27 (which is my favorite number) and I feel like my birthday will just be pretty much like any other day. I guess I just wanted it to be memorable and beyond great. I know it will be lovely … I’ll be spending the evening with my family. So that is nice. It’s too just bad that Adam Brody won’t walk into my classroom and kiss me. That would also be nice … memorable and beyond great. Ha ha. I have a hope that this year of me being 27 will be one of the best years of my life. I should probably find a candle to blow out.

Catch Up or Ketchup

So, I haven’t posted in a really long time. I’ve been rather busy. Let’s see what to discuss first. Well, good news sounds like a nice first topic. When I became in charge of the drama department at my school two years ago … it was in massive debt. Massive. But I just found out on Friday that I got us out of the hole. So, that was legit. My students performed well in their Winter play. Now we are moving on to competition, the variety show, inductions, and our workshop for little kids. Needless to say … there has been no break. But I suppose it is good and healthy to stay busy.
I have also made some shifts in my personal life. For one, I’m trying online dating. I got this idea from my sister, which was then re-suggested by my Bishop. Not really my kind of thing but it is true I’m not meeting people my own age. And here is the deal … I want to stay in the area I am at so badly. I love love love love love my job. IT is my happiest thing. But I can’t keep having a completely dead social life. So, I plan on moving in the next year. But I feel sad about leaving my job … my kids. I’d rather stay. So, I’m in this new kick to fight to stay. So, I’m trying online dating and I am process of moving to a different area so that I can maybe stay. We’ll see how it goes. The important thing is I know what I want and I’m willing to fight for it. I’ve made a deal with God. After try everything I can this year to be social and still nothing is happening … I’ll go. I guess we’ll see what happens.
Other topics … I’m really tired of them killing Alaric on Vampire Diaries. He is one of my favorites and it upsets me greatly every time. Two, I’m starting to dig the Caroline/Klaus thing. Although I’ll feel somewhat bad for Tyler. Three, Elena is driving me nuts. Normally, I like her just fine but urgh! Four, why does Damon have to lash out. He’s a complete hazard to himself. I still love him. Five. Stefan is an idiot. And I’m sick of them making it seem like he is the good guy. He is so not a good guy. Done.
I am watching the Bachelor. I know … stupid. You don’t have to tell me. I know. But I have been watching it anyway. And I am so ticked off. Ben keeps Courtney (one of the most horrible chicks I have ever seen) and kicks off Kacie B.? Probably the most normal girl on the show. I do like Lindsi and I liked Emily. Ben is so dumb. I’ve lost a lot of respect for him. Not going to lie. I think he deserves Courtney at this point.
Let’s see … I’ve started watching White Collar. Excellent.
I need to start exercising again. I’ve been really bad. Hmmm …. yeah I think that sums up my life at the moment. Ha ha.

New Years Resolutions … is there a point?

I mean let’s be honest … we all make them but do we ever keep them after the first week or month? This sounds super pessimistic but bear with me cause I actually do feel we need them. We probably just need them more often. New Years allows us to reflect on the year … see what we liked and what we didn’t like and it helps us to see what we want in the future. For instance, one of the most common New Years Eve goals is to lose weight, eat healthy and exercise regularly. There is always a new herd of members at a gym right at the beginning of the year. I’ve been one of those people. Then life happens and my regular workout turns into once a week if I’m lucky or one week in the month I do really well but there is no regular about it. However, because I made those goals in the first place great things have happened … allow me to explain. Last year around this time of year I lived by myself, I had just experienced a break up and I didn’t have any close friends nearby. I was very alone. However, I had a new urge to work out and be healthy. I decided to go to Zumba (the gym was a waste of money because I didn’t love going) so I invited Best Friend (who I didn’t know very well) to go with me. And now she is one of the closest friends I’ve ever had. Do we go to Zumba regularly anymore? No, we are lucky if we go once a month. But I built a friendship thanks to making a resolution to get out there.
I feel like resolutions give us opportunities. And if we are awesome enough to follow through with them we get deep satisfaction. And even if by the end of the year we didn’t keep to the goal maybe we met that one person, or read that one book, or painted that one drawing, or went on that one trip that has shaped us more than if we had decided to screw resolutions altogether and do nothing. The possibility and likely hood of failure should never stop you.
The last couple years my resolution has been “Be kind to yourself.” I got this idea from one of my favorite books, The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. I liked it because I felt that it encompassed everything I wanted to improve on physically, spiritually, socially, etc. But this year I think I would like to be more specific. I am keeping with my goal to be kind to myself but I’d like to make a list of ideas on how to do that. And maybe I won’t be completely successful but I feel like anything I actually do will be a success and it will force me to think about it and maybe try more.
How I will be kind to myself this year
1. Read one book per month (I got this idea from my sister who is amazing and has done a book a week goal the last couple years… I’m a slow reader but I also hate that I only read during the holiday break and summer. So instead of a book a week I am gonna try a book a month.)
2. I am going to work out twice a week (whether it is zumba, or taking a walk, or riding a bike, playing soccer or another sport etc.)
3. I am going to take a dance class and keep with it regularly.
4. I am going to try and write at least 1 letter per month (sounds weird but I suck at actually writing letters and I think it would be a good thing)
5. I am going to go on at least 6 dates this year. (This is my bold one. Ha.)
6. I am going to try and do the whole sugar only on weekends things.
7. I am going to keep a journal (and try to maybe write in it at least once a week).
8. Every week I am going to try a new recipe I have never done.
9. I am going to do my visiting teaching (ha ha … or try to really hard.)
10. I am going to take risks (whatever that means … I have been wanting to go to Vegas.)

Okay there is my list of ten things. I am sure there are other things but I figure I shouldn’t overdo it. And maybe instead of being an annual thing I should look over my list once a month and see how I am doing or see if there is something that needs more attention, etc. I don’t reflect as much as I think I should. I whine, complain, pity myself, etc. And I just think it is time I take my life more into my own hands than I have before. I need to stop waiting for it to all work out and make it all work out. With God’s help, of course. 🙂

How I Met Your Mother, Las Vegas and yeah

Lately, I have been on this huge How I Met Your Mother kick. Netflix has seasons 1-6 up and I have been watching an episode or three every day. I am in love with the characters (except Robin. She’s just okay) and I think the writing is witty, clever and fun. I also like the concept of five friends who hang out all the time. I even like that they have a hang out spot (even if it is a bar). Reminds me Friends in the coffee shop. I can’t say how much I want a group of friends like that. I like that it’s not weird with Marshall and Lily who are married. I like that they do random stuff and support each other. I am so envious of this tv show. I don’t have anything close to that. I really only hang out with two people. Juan and Best Friend. Juan has other friends he likes to chill with and Best friend has a Boyfriend. So this means I spend most of my time alone. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m cool but … yeah. Here is the thing … I feel so out of place with college students in general. So out of place. And then at work everyone is married with kids and I know they don’t mean to but i feel out of place with them too. I live in Mormon country where 26 is old and if you aren’t married 26 is not old enough. I have been stuck in limbo for about 4 years. And I don’t know how to find people like me. I’m rare. Ha. And I can’t go hang out at a bar. Although sometimes I feel like I would be more at place there. Not because of the drinking but more that the people wouldn’t make me feel like a an old loser/ failure. I need a Barney in my life who tells me not to get married and to “Suit Up” so we can go do crazy things. I need a Marshall and Lily who keep me hopeful but don’t rub it in my face that they are married and I’m not. I need a Ted, who wants what I want just as much as I do. We could whine to each other. Ha. And I even want a Robin … who is just random. I don’t know. I guess I want friends. Wow, I sound majorly pathetic right now. But who cares. I still want it. I want to be around adults who are my age who have a career and who aren’t weird … like socially awkward weird where you are like “Oh that’s why they aren’t married” See which is horrible. I really don’t like this part of Mormon culture where I live. Cause I don’t think it is like this with Mormons in other places. So move, Sarah. Ha, right. I’ll just pack up, get another job and move by myself to where? North Dakota? And I’ll just pick history or drama to teach because the chances of me getting another job where I teach both is so fat and slim. And I’ll pray that my over all faculty and staff will be as wonderful. And I’ll just pray that I actually do move to a place with single Mormons my age. And I’ll hope that I actually meet some buddies instead of just literally being all alone and not having family or Best Friend. Ha ha. That sounds like a risk I want to take all alone. Ahhhh. Oh the constant debate in my head. It’s gross. But back to happy things. I saw a clip of President Eyring saying that BYU-I graduates would go on to be legen … wait for it dary. i was so happy. I wanted to do the whole high five but I was alone in the room. Anyway, I love the show.
So, I’ve been so stressed with work, and that constant debate in my head about going or staying and with feeling just out of place everywhere except at my parent’s home and with my students and … I decided I need to get away so badly. I was thinking Las Vegas. No joke. It’s not typical for me and I need not typical. Of course, once again I’d probably have to go alone. Best Friend doesn’t seem to think going alone to Las Vegas would be wise. But staying here in Logan and being alone for New Years sounds so completely depressing. I don’t want to push my way into other peoples’ New Years Plans either. I thought of visiting Best Friend and I’ve talked about it with her. And of course, she was like “Come” but then I’m like … she wants to be with her man for New Years what was I thinking? I don’t want to come be that annoying third wheel that invites herself into their plans. Maybe I could go visit some extended family. And this sounds so bad and I don’t mean it to … But most of my cousins my age are married and most of them with kids and that just sounds a little depressing to me … I want to get away from feeling like a failure for a couple nights. I’m so happy for them and I love love love spending time with them but I just need a break from being the only single one around.
I’d go visit Renbeth because her house is always an escape for me. I love seeing my nephew and playing games/ talking with Renbeth and Gretchen and eating good food. But I’m poor.
So, I feel at a loss. I invited Juan to Las Vegas offering to pay but he didn’t seem to keen on the idea. I think he’d rather spend New Years Eve with his friends than with his sister. So, maybe I will risk it and just go alone. I just can’t be here this year. I really just need out of Utah for a couple days to clear my head. So yeah.

Mormons are Christians

Mormons are Christians. And anyone who says differently is either ignorant about Mormons or ignorant about what the definition of Christian is.

Definitions from,
a person who believes in Jesus Christ; adherent of Christianity.

a person who exemplifies in his or her life the teachings of Christ: He died like a true Christian.

one who professes belief in the teachings of Jesus Christ.

Does this definition say anything about the trinity or how much revelation God has sent to Earth or anything that Mormons do differently from other Christian churches? No. Let me assure you that every Sunday at church Christ is discussed … in every lesson Christ is brought up no matter what the topic. The head of our Church is Christ. People are claiming that we are not Christian because we have the Book of Mormon. Does anyone even read the whole title: The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. We teach from both the Bible and Book of Mormon. Is it really so hard to believe that God and and His Son would teach more people than just those in Europe between creation and what … 1500 or 1600s? Is it so insane to believe that Christ would come to Earth in our day and age? Why would there be no more prophets? Does that make sense that God and Christ would just stop all communication and say, “yeah, just go with what we gave the people hundreds of years ago.” And how are we less Christian by saying Christ is his own being and so is Heavenly Father and the Holy Ghost. I don’t get how that lessens our Christianity at all. And because we think Christ will come to Earth again … oh heck we must totally not be Christians then. How could we believe He is still around and still cares and still plans on coming again. I currently read an article that discussed this question and it just royally ticked me off. It referred to our church having “loopiness”. I’m just so sick of people who have to tear down other religions. IT bugs me so much. It bugs me if a fellow Mormon does it to someone else. Gosh, our church name is not even really Mormon it is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! We don’t have to agree. And I am totally cool with people saying, “I believe this is different and your way doesn’t make sense to me.” That’s fine. There are items in other peoples’ religions that don’t make sense to me. But I don’t try to tell people what they are or aren’t. Example: I don’t say to a Catholic … you aren’t Christian because you’re not from one of the Protestant churches that formed. That’s so stupid. Catholics are totally Christian. I also don’t say to a Seventh Day Adventist … you aren’t Christian cause you honor the Sabbath on a Saturday. Again stupid. Seventh Day Adventists are totally Christian! Don’t tell me I’m not a Chrisitan. Ask me if I am. And I will tell you. Yes, a million times over. MY entire belief system revolves around Jesus Christ. Christ is my savior, my friend and most importantly my brother. And I love him so much. And I want so much to be more like him. And I love his teachings. I am a follower of Christ. And my parents are. And the people in my ward are. And in my stake. And in my entire religion. My prophet, Thomas S. Monson is one of the greatest followers of great I know. So, this whole debate about Mormons being Christians is just silly. And honestly, why? Why is it even happening? How is it hurting other religions to admit we are Christian. I’m not somehow offended or hurt by saying Baptists or Presbyterians are Christian. It doesn’t effect my belief system at all. So people just get over it and stop trying to tell other people what they believe in! Urgh!

Awkward Situation

I have told this story to several people but in case you have not heard my sad tale . . . here it is. Tuesday morning I woke up and saw that I had a text awaiting me on my phone. It was from a number I had never seen before and it was sent at like 1am. The text went as follows (this is from memory) “Hey Freckles (this was actually my real name not Freckles), this is Whitney. Sorry this text is so late but Michelle and I want to go to lunch tomorrow at noon and you should come.” My first, thought is who is Whitney? I only know two. One is a past student (and how would she get my number) and the second was an acquaintance from an old ward … sure we say hi at the store but we’ve never hung out. I text back “Which Whitney is this?” It ended up being the second Whitney possibility (the acquaintance). I still found her offer random … I decided to check out facebook and see who this Michelle person is. It turns out we did have a mutual facebook friend named Michelle (another old student of mine). That’s when I figured they must have been talking and realized they both knew me and wanted to do lunch. Now, I thought about declining the offer but then I was like … you know what, I should go on a nice lunch outing. It might be a little weird but it was so sweet of them to ask. I agree to go. We decide to meet at this hamburger joint i had never heard of. When I got there I noticed a text from Whitney saying they would be late. I texted back that I was there and asked if I should just go in. I didn’t hear back right away and it was hot sitting in my car so I just went on inside. I looked the menu over and waited. Finally, Whitney entered. To my surprise the two girls with her were complete strangers to me. This was RED FLAG #1. I walk up to them and say hey. Whitney smiles at me and says hello. I say, “Thanks for inviting me.” She gives a weird blank look. RED FLAG #2. I say, “So do you guys eat here alot.” The two stranger girls nod. I say, “Well, I know what I want. Do you care if I order?” One of the girls I don’t know says, “You were here first.” I go up to the counter and hear RED FLAG #3. “Where’s Freckles? (Note my name is very common and I am just using Freckles for it). It fully hits me . . . they invited the wrong Freckles. I feel my face heat up as I attempt to order my food casually. The woman at the counter asks if we are all together. Final Red Flag #4, one of the other girls says “no.” The worst part of this situation is I was forced to wait for my food. I planned on getting it to go but I still had to wait. The woman at the counter asks the girls if they are ready to order. One of them says, “No, we are waiting for a friend.” And I’m just like in my head, “Your friend is not coming, darlings.” I considered texting them and saying “Sorry, I can’t make it.” So they wouldn’t think their friend was a jerk but I decided against that quickly. I instead texted Punk. His advice was to try and make it super awkward for them. Which would have been funny except to make it really awkward for them I would have to reveal to them they invited the wrong Freckles and I did not want a pity lunch. After, I got my food I quickly left the restaurant, saying a nice pleasant goodbye to Whitney. I then texted and explained there had been a misunderstanding. Whitney texted back and was all “This isn’t Freckles Hancey?” Nope. I told her who it really was and soon got a phone call with her apologizing profusely. I told her it wasn’t a big deal (cause now that I was out of the embarrassing/ awkward situation it wasn’t.) She offered to have me come back and join them for lunch. Ha. I rejected that idea. I told her not to worry and just to think of it as a funny story. Cause that is what it is. I have to say I played it pretty cool once I realized I was not actually invited to lunch. Anyway, I ended up just eating by myself at the park. Which was fine. I got good food out of it all. And I called Renbeth at the park so I wasn’t eating completely alone. Ha ha. Anyway, I now know to check if anyone random invites me to lunch. Good chances they are inviting a different Freckles.

Kids Rock

So the guy who does this, Tim Hawkins is pretty funny. I actually would consider buying this cd.

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