Feeling, old, tired and cranky

I have this roommate … lovely girl … (we’ll call her Marsha) but she likes to throw parties at our house and she likes to throw them on school nights and she and her friends like to be loud and hang out in the kitchen which is right next to my room. And it makes sense. She’s in college. And she has a social life. I get it. But oh my goodness … I am just like please go upstairs, stop laughing so loud, etc. I sound so lame, huh? I feel old. Not old old. But I am not in the college scene anymore. I have a career. I have responsibilities and I have to teach and grade and plan and direct all day long and I need my fetching sleep. I find having roommates again is so difficult. I love living with Best Friend (she is marvelous and makes me so happy– and she is why I moved in with roomies in the first place) but next year I need to be on my own again. It may have been lonely but at least I didn’t have to deal with anyone else but me. And I find that my loneliness is deeper than whether or not I have roommates. It’s not that my roommates aren’t great … I just am … I don’t know. In some weird limbo that I can’t get out of. 

Oh my gosh it’s like they chill right next to my door. AHHHHHHHHHHH! So mad. Really? Really? There are so many other places they could fetching go. The best part is I can hear my roommate shhhing them but they are still being loud and then I heard someone say “How old is she?” and another person say, “Old enough to get over it.” Oh I need my own place so bad. Maybe they weren’t talking about me but it doesn’t change the fact that I want out. Best Friend is the only one keeping me here. If it weren’t for her I’d try to sell my contract and get out. At least she keeps me sane. Yay for Best Friend. 

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